The goose sat trembling in her nest. She had just heard the most terrifying news. The horse, whose stall was next to her nest had just heard from the barn cat, who heard from the crow, who heard from the dog, who heard from the mouse who lived in the farmhouse inside a tiny hole in the wall, that the farmer and his wife were not having turkey this year for Thanksgiving, but were having goose. GOOSE!
“Honk!” She shook so violently that she laid an egg. “Oh what am I to do? I’m too young to die!”
“I’d hardly say you’re young! You’re practically leather under all those old feathers!” whinnied the horse. He saw that this was not helpful to his friend the goose who was now sobbing in between choked honks. “Don’t worry, friend Goose!” the horse tried again. “We’ll think of something.”
So all the farm animals held a meeting to help save their friend, the goose.
“No wonder the farmer and his wife weren’t raising a turkey this year,” the cat observed while licking her paw. “I didn’t mind it so much; I’m not fond of turkeys. They’re so unsociable. Always ‘gobble this’ and ‘gobble that.’ Rather boring, I say.”
“Never mind that,” barked the dog. “How will we save our friend?”
The wise owl had been waiting patiently for his turn to speak up. “As we all know, the snow has come early this year, and the children have built a snowman out in the meadow. The snowman has a coat and hat and scarf. Perhaps if the goose took the place of the snowman, she would be disguised, and the farmer wouldn’t find her when the time comes for slaughter.”
At the sound of “slaughter” the poor goose wailed again.
All the animals agreed to this idea. Together, with a heave, the farm animals knocked the snowman down, dressed goose up in the snowman clothes, and she stood where the snowman once did. After one blustery night though, Goose couldn’t take it. Even with her warm down feathers, it was too much for her to bear. The animals regathered to think up a new plan.
“I have an idea,” said the dog. “The farmer’s wife has not redecorated that house since 1982. Along with all of the mauve and dusty blue, there is an equal amount of geese decorating the place. Geese wallpaper, geese curtains, geese salt and pepper shakers. It’s risky, but if we can get Goose in there, I think she’d blend right in!”
Not a few minutes after dog spoke, people began to arriving in carloads at the farmhouse. Each family carrying dishes filled with food for a feast.
Still dressed in the snowman clothes, Goose waddled underneath the dog, and slipped (or, tumbled, rather) with him through the dog door. They quickly looked around.
“There!” the dog whispered to Goose, and pointed with his long nose. “Let’s get you up on that shelf.” As the family was busy making dinner preparations, Goose climbed upon the dog’s back and leapt up upon the shelf. She sat as still as could be. She was nervous about the risky mission, but happy to be in the warm home.
The family sat around the table and began dishing up food. They prayed, ate, and raved about the moose that the farmer’s brother had brought from his most recent hunt.
Moose??
“Honk!” Honked the goose. An egg dropped from the shelf and landed splat upon the ground.
And that, children, is why we shouldn’t gossip.
The end.
Emily M.
Once there was a rascally little goose who drove Mother Goose crazy every day.
“Whyyyy do I HAVE tooooo!” she whined at the littlest request to help clear her own dishes.
“What do I get if I do?” she tried to sweeten her tone when she finally decided to drag herself out of her chair to obey.
“Where are we going today, Mother—to the store to buy me some more clothes?” Mother Goose couldn’t even look at her, for fear she would reveal how she really felt.
Every day was like this, until finally Mother Goose decided to get some help with her unruly daughter.
The winter wind blew so cold and sharp that Mother Goose lost her breath for an instant as she stepped away from her cozy home. Even so she was so relieved to be free of her daughter for an instant that she let out a telling sigh that did not go unnoticed by a snowman nearby.
“Pardon me, madam, but things must be pretty bad in there?” he politely inquired.
“Oh, you have no idea!” she began and relayed her troubles and determination to find some help.
“Hmmmm,” the snowman began slowly, “I believe you have come to the right place.”
“How do you mean?” asked Mother Goose, in tears.
“The children who made me were rather…unique,” he began. “They put a funny spell on me, I do believe, which is why I am still here. They have come and taught me many things. And I will have to check with them, but I believe there is a spell on anyone who takes my clothing—“
Just then the infamous daughter rushed out of the house, “Oh Mother, there you are! How could you LEAVE me!” her voice was shrill.
“I’m just talking to this snowman here, dear,” Mother Goose was, I am sad to say, apologetic.
“Oh, look at that scarf!” the little goose turned her attention to the snowman and rushed at him, rudely snatching the scarf off of him.
And that is how Mother Goose was saved from her unbelievable daughter, who is now a cute little stuffed goose upon her shelf, with no eyes or legs, but a darling little snowman scarf.
Cedar
There was once a goose named Alberta, who was silly and cheerful, and loved to wear extravagant clothes and costumes. She wore a new costume every single day, most of them handmade, and waddled around in them cheerfully, knowing how silly she looked, but enjoying herself anyway. The other animals thought she was funny, but not terribly funny; and they were a little confused by her willful silliness. What was the point? They wondered.
Alberta used to go out every day and wander around the neighborhood, asking everyone about their plans and trying to either join in or persuade them to join her in something else. The animals thought this was tiresome, but she never took offense if they declined and never pressed too hard. And she would always be looking out at them from under a big frilly bonnet or fruit basket hat or something, and at least she gave them a reason to chuckle and shake their heads at each other.
Once she dressed as Cookie Monster. Her costume was bright blue and hairy and she had two big googly eyes attached to the headpiece, and she went to every house in the neighborhood handing out chocolate chip cookies, each one with a bite shape taken out of it.
“I didn’t actually bite it,” she said over and over again, putting cookies into everyone’s hands and paws. “I used the edge of a flower cookie cutter. ‘C’ is for ‘cookie,’ ta ta!” And she waddled off.
One day in July, Alberta dressed as a snowman with a flannel scarf and top hat, and she went through the neighborhood asking everyone to be in her Christmas choir.
She actually rounded up seven animals who said they would sing Christmas carols with her. Alberta wanted them to sing on the street corner, but no one agreed. So they sang in her living room instead.
Alberta made hot chocolate. She hadn’t thought ahead enough to make Christmas cookies, but she had some Oreos in the cupboard, and in a jiffy she’d made a white icing, dipped a dozen Oreos, and sprinkled them with red and green sprinkles. She served these to her guests and then assigned them parts.
It turned out that Bailey the Goat had a terrific voice. Nibbs was a mouse, and got a whole verse of “Away in a Manger” all to himself.
Emily H
Lights open on stage right, where a stuffed goose is perched on a bench. Goose has nothing on.
Lights on stage left where a door is seen. Door opens, Etta and Gerald enter.
Etta: laughing. Oh, Gerald, what fun it was to ice skate tonight! She twirls as she remembers skating. She trips and falls into Gerald’s arms, still laughing.
Gerald: laughing. You don’t seem to have gotten your land legs back, my dear. He dips her back and kisses her. As she bend backwards, her eyes alight on the goose.
Etta: shrieks Aaah! And falls to the ground.
Gerald: My dear! Looks in the direction of the goose. Ah, that demmed creature. How’d it get out here again? Stomps across the stage, grabs the goose, hurls it off into the darkness. Turns to tend to Etta, who is covering her face with her hands.
Etta: Oh Gerald, how I hate that thing! Why oh why did your mother give it to us??
Gerald: And it was her dying wish that we care for it…
Etta: smothers a sob. Care for it?? It’s dead! It’s rubbish! It’s nothing! Can’t we please get rid of it??
Gerald: I’m not so sure it’s dead…
Etta: shudders
Gerald: And anyway, we can’t deny the final wish of a dead woman.
Etta: Gerald, she’s DEAD. Like the goose. Neither one will care if we get rid of it!
She stands up and marches over to the darkness where Gerald threw the goose. The lights flicker briefly. When they come up, the goose is back on the bench, now wearing a scarf. Etta shrieks.
Gerald: There, you see?! It’s not dead!
Etta: But what in the world??? How does it keep doing this? I hate it, oh Gerald, I hate it! Etta grabs the goose and flings it once more into the darkness, then runs back to Gerald’s arms, crying.
Gerald: There, there. It’s strange, but I’m sure it’s not malicious.
Etta: backing away. You’re sure? You’re sure that the dead-but-somehow-living goose is not malicious? She gestures towards the dark spot where she threw it. The lights flicker again. When they come up, the goose is once more on the bench, now wearing a coat in addition to the scarf. Etta yelps. Gerald makes a sound of alarm.
Gerald: Well, er, ah…I mean, there’s nothing so malicious about a little creature dressing up in cute winter clothes…
Etta: WHERE DID THOSE CLOTHES EVEN COME FROM? Oh Gerald, does the goose have other taxidermied friends who are helping it??? Oh Gerald, I hate it!
She runs across the stage and this time she kicks the goose with all her might. It spins magnificently through the air and into the darkness beyond. Etta sits down and sobs. Gerald approaches and rubs her gently on the back.
Etta: Gerald, we must get rid of it. Surely your mother didn’t intend for us to live in this kind of terror.
Gerald: But my dear, what is it you’re afraid of? It’s merely dressing in adorable winter clothing!
Etta: staring incredulously at Gerald. Gerald…It shouldn’t be DOING anything!!! She begins to sob again as the lights flicker once more. When they come up, the goose is back on the bench, now wearing a miniature top hat. Etta lets out a bloodcurdling scream and Gerald leaps to his feet.
Gerald: Good Lord! It’s back! Now he moves forward, as if to grab the goose by the neck.
Etta: Wait!
Gerald: pauses, looks over his shoulder confused.
Etta: Actually….Actually Gerald, now, hear me out….Now it’s rather cute.
Gerald: looks back at the goose and begins to chuckle. It is rather, isn’t it? They both laugh. The distant sound of carolers approaches.
Etta: Oh Gerald, carolers! Doesn’t our goose look like a little caroler?
Gerald: Indeed my dear, that it does.
Etta: Let’s go join them, shall we? And take the goose with us?
Gerald: Let me grab my hat.
Gerald retrieves his hat from the hook where he’d left it, and Etta picks up the goose. They go outside, and their voices join those of the carolers. The lights flicker. Everyone screams. The lights go down.
The End.
Elisa
The challenge: Write a story about the image.
20 minutes.
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